L I T by K R A V E N

Addicted to Attention in the Facebook Age

Social networks like Tumblr, no matter how easy they make it for the most mundane individual to appear brilliant, unique, and creative, will still be prone to the same old diseases that stifled and virtually killed Myspace, making it a barren wasteland of softcore porn and wannabes. The fall came most notably by the epidemic of sheer pretentiousness spread rapidly by attention-whores, most trying to mask their lack of self-esteem and personality as boredom (i.e. “I’m soooo bored, send me messages in my ask box!”).

Though the infection was a bit more subtle in the early days of the first prominent digital populous, Myspace, it eventually escalated beyond control, with millions of people so starved and desperate for attention that some would even labor to send hundreds of personal messages asking people to come and comment on their profile or photos, as I imagine an addict would knock on the doors of his familiars looking for a fix until he finds one, though he’ll never be satisfied in the end.

The photos got more sexy and raunchy, as if everyone was trying to outdo one another in some twisted and perverted pageant, and it became less about making friends and networking, and more about the one thing most people (even those that benefitted from it) hated about High School: it’s a fucking popularity contest.

Yea, you’re super smart, but are your clothes from The Gap? [Gasp!] Ew, the horror! …Oh! Look at that new girl with her edgy hairstyle and Louis Vuitton bag… God, I hope she likes me!

Even bartering systems came about, with people offering to comment on one of your photos if you did the same in return, some opportunists even promoting a 2-for-1 special. And just like the real world we live in, someone always comes along to capitalize on the sickness, and thanks to Facebook, now you can seek out someone to “like” you in almost every corner and facet of the web. It’s okay to be liked! Matter of fact, it’s good! Just like cigarettes and booze!

Here on Tumblr, luckily we have the option to protect ourselves from this silent and relentless invasion, but I still find myself often faced with that vicious virus, only mutated in more complex and antibiotic-resistant forms, with users doing things like filling out what appear to be cute, and long, surveys (I prefer the terms vapid and shallow to describe them) or dropping esoteric symbols into ask boxes to get a neat prize in return.

Leave a ‘€’ in my ask box and I’ll tell you if I’d like to fuck you with or without a condom!

Ugh. I am not immune in the least, but I am also not infected, and certainly not willing to give in to the temptation for the sake of assimilation or having hundreds of devoted fans and followers who supposedly love me, or want to sext me, and make me feel good when I write about feeling fat, ugly, or depressed (symptoms that can be attributed easily to the lack of my own mind or soul) by filling my ask box like sluts with fake tits fill any popular club’s VIP room with compliments, sweet nothings, niceties, and offers for camera phone porn.

Regardless, those deserving of attention usually get it. I don’t wish to request or be requested to follow or ask — several times over at that — because if I applied such a concept to the non-digital world, how insanely stupid and silly would I look?? Let me demonstrate it for you:

‘Scuse me, can I trouble you to ask me something, like who do I have a crush on? I’m so bored and lonely. -or- Hi, you seem really cool, and I love your shoes! Wow! …now will you come and follow me back to where I came from please??

I’m glad some people have been given a platform to meet people and introduce themselves to others in a manner that would have been virtually impossible for most of us several years ago; however there is a sad, vicious cycle at play: with so many people seeking the attention in the digital world that they often fail to receive, or feel the need to compensate for due to some other internal imperfection, in the real world, that’s less interesting people (learning to become more unique and interesting and not just like every other cog in their preferred social network) to be out and about socializing in real life and time on our planet. Less people to stop one another on the street and become friends because they liked each other’s style and grew up in the same city, less people to bump into that adorable person accidentally in a coffeeshop and have a good laugh and maybe dinner and a movie, or to strike up a wonderful conversation because they’re in the same area of the bookstore and eventually fall in love and get married (mind you, this is not mere fantasy, that’s exactly how my best friend met her husband. I was there).

Such wonderful young people competing when there is no need, and trying so desperately to feel like somebody that they’d rather settle for having people tell them such a thing, even if it’s completely untrue, instead of using their time and efforts to become a real, genuine person worth another’s love and attention. It’s a small problem that’s creating awful consequences, as my peers that can recall with me a time where people’s lives weren’t lived, in large part, so digitally, have noted that many people, young and old, are quite different in a negative way and unlike people from just a couple generations ago. They are harder to converse with, more difficult to date, and almost pointless to fall for, since they’re all on the never-ending quest for the next person, place or thing that’s more popular, more pretty, or more ‘liked,’ even if they’ll get absolutely nothing for their eternal quest in return.

We should be advancing in this age of digital information and networking, yet in our typical pursuits of personal fame, fortune and vanity, we are far behind, left dumb and confused, wondering why no one likes us when we could be dancing out and helping one another grow and prosper in the real universe.

Unplug your surrogate.